Nervous…

The oddest thing has happened to me today. I’m really getting nervous to tie on my belt tomorrow and walk out on to the mats. My exam is over, I worked hard but I’m not sure if I’m ready for the reaction from everyone that wasn’t there at the exam. I think it’s going to feel so weird to be a black belt ‘all of a sudden’. Never mind that I have toiled away for years just trying to reach this level. All of a sudden I have the belt in my hand and all of the responsibilities that go with it. I’m almost overwhelmed.

Now don’t get me wrong, part of me is very excited to let everyone see my belt. Interestingly my son can’t wait for us to go in and train so that, in his words, “everyone will congratulate him” on my promotion. I find that sweet and endearing and I’m anxious to get his report at the end of the evening as to how it feels to be the son of a black belt. He’s definitely enjoying this, I can tell.

I wrote an open letter today to post in the dojo, offering my thanks to all who have helped me along the way. Perhaps I’ll post it here after I give put it in the dojo. There are so many people who have helped me along the way. I wish that I could thank them all.

I almost feel like a brand new white belt, I’m so nervous. I guess that makes a lot of sense though – I’m just beginning this amazing journey. The door to real growth just opened. I want to sprint down the path but I know I have to take baby steps to really get to where I’m headed. Aren’t life and karate such exciting journeys?

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